Purity Test

Editor’s note

The “purity text” originally included in the section Survival in the Tute has been moved here.

According to Wikipedia, purity tests were among the earliest memes and popular on Usenet in the early 1980s, around the same time that the NtRH was originally written.

The content may contain language or viewpoints that may be offensive or insensitive by current-day standards. The text is included here for historical reasons, but it is not necessary for understanding the NtRH.

The Unabridged Purity Test

Answer each question with a “yes” or a “no.” You score one point for each “no.” The higher the score, the greater the personal purity rating.

Section 1

For this section, SOMEONE is to be interpreted as someone of the opposite sex. Have you ever:

1. been sexually aroused?
2. had an arousing dream?
3. had an orgasm?
4. kissed someone?
5. french kissed someone?
6. kissed someone other than on the lips?
7. slept with someone(just slept)?
8. had a date past 1 a.m.?
9. had a date Friday, Saturday, and Sunday of the same weekend?
10. kissed someone while you were in the horizontal position?
11. kissed someone on the first date?
12. ear frenched someone, or been ear frenched by someone else?
13. necked continuously for more that 15 minutes?
14. necked continuously for more than two hours?
15. gotten entangled while necking?
16. petted below the shoulders?
17. slow danced (those wandering hands!)?
18. had you or your partner had an orgasm while petting?
19. exaggerated about your sexual experience?
20. gone out with only one person for a while?
21. gone swimming with someone in the nude?
22. bathed or showered with someone (got real clean, didn’t you)?
23. stuffed a bra or pants?
24. picked someone up, or let someone pick you up?

Section 2: have you been on either end of

1. fondling a woman’s covered breast (not your mothers)?
2. fondling a woman’s bare breast (same restriction applies)?
3. fondling the bare breast of a woman who was picked up?
4. sucking a woman’s nipple (subsequent to your weaning)?
5. fondled someone’s covered genitals?
6. fondled someone’s bare genitals?
7. fondled someone’s covered genitals on the first date?
8. fondled someone’s bare genitals on the first date?
9. pinching or patting the buttocks of a member of the opposite sex?

Section 3: Continue normally

1. gone through the motions of sexual intercourse while fully clothed?
2. done #34 on the first date?
3. seen someone completely nude?
4. been seen completely nude by someone?
5. been with someone while both of you were completely nude?
6. told someone you loved them when you did not?
7. had two dates with two different people on the same night?
8. gone steady with two different people at the same time?
9. done #41 without either of them knowing?
10. done #41 WITH one or both of them knowing?
11. told or listened to dirty jokes in mixed company?
12. read pornographic literature?
13. bought pornographic literature?
14. bought sexual objects?
15. seen a pornographic movie?
16. seen a burlesque show (Rocky Horror counts)?
17. exposed yourself in public?
18. played strip poker(or any other such activity)?
19. masturbated?
20. done #52 with a foreign object?
21. done #52 where you could have been discovered?
22. done #52 while someone was watching?
23. done #52 at least once a week for more than 3 months?
24. done #52 at least once a day for more than 1 month?
25. discussed #52?
26. done #58 in mixed company?

Section 4: drugs, etc:

1. been arrested?
2. been convicted of a felony?
3. smoked a cigarette, cigar, or pipe(tobacco only)?
4. smoked or eaten marijuana?
5. had an alcoholic drink?
6. been intoxicated?
7. vomited due to excessive consumption of alcohol?
8. passed out due to excessive consumption of alcohol?
9. completely forgotten what happened while you were drunk?
10. bought any illegal drugs?
11. sold any illegal drugs?
12. taken stimulants?
13. taken depressants or pain killers?
14. inhaled nitrous oxide?
15. sniffed glue, magic markers, or anything containing butyl nitrate?
16. taken any opiate in any form?
17. used cocaine?
18. injected any drug into your veins?
19. taken pcp?
20. done any of the above 4 more than once?
21. tripped (taken lsd or psilocybin or peyote)?
22. tripped more than once?
23. tripped more than 5 times?
24. tripped more than 10 times?
25. had sex while tripping?

Section 5: serious sex

1. been propositioned by someone?
2. propositioned someone?
3. given a backrub with ulterior motives?
4. fondled someone who was asleep?
5. fondled someone while you were asleep?
6. lied to someone in order to seduce them?
7. received mononucleosis (kissers disease)?
8. performed oral sex on someone?
9. had oral sex performed on you?
10. sixty-nine (#92 & #93 simultaneously)?
11. performed mutual masturbation?
12. maneuvered someone into bed somewhat against their will?
13. had someone maneuver you into bed somewhat against your will?
14. successfully used any drug to lower their inhibitions?
15. had #98 attempted on you?
16. had sexual intercourse?
17. done #100 without birth control?
18. had sex with a virgin (not yourself)?
19. had sex with more than one virgin?
20. had sex in a room other than a bedroom?
21. had sex on the floor?
22. had sex in a car?
23. had sex dog fashion (from behind)?
24. had sex on both top and bottom?
25. had sex sitting up?
26. had sex Greek fashion (anal)?
27. had sex in any position other than those mentioned above?
28. read The Joy Of Sex (or other similar material)?
29. had sex on the first date?
30. had sex with more than one person?
31. had sex with more than 5 people?
32. had sex with more than 10 people?
33. had sex more than 10 times with the same person? (no time limit)
34. had sex more than once in the same 24 hour period?
35. had sex more than 5 times in the same 24 hour period?
36. had sex more than 10 times in the same 24 hour period?
37. had sex with someone of a different race?
38. had sex with more than one person in 24 hours?
39. had sex while someone was watching?
40. had sex out of doors?
41. had sex in a place where you could be discovered?
42. been discovered?
43. had sex for money, or paid for sex yourself?
44. had sex for some favor, or given some favor for sex?
45. had sex with someone more than 5 years older or younger than you?
46. done #129 with more than a 10 year difference?
47. been in a menage-a-trois (two on one)?
48. been on either end of ejaculation before impending entry (messy,aren’t we)?
49. thought you might be or caused someone to be pregnant?
50. been or caused someone to be pregnant?
51. had (or still have) venereal disease?
52. transmitted #135?
53. participated in a gang bang?
54. been involved in committing statutory rape (i.e. lived in Massachusetts)?
55. willingly committed incest?
56. been involved in the committing of adultery?

Section 6: homosexual

Everything in this section is to be interpreted for homosexuality. In this section, SOMEONE is to be interpreted as someone of the same sex.

1. held hands, or otherwise displayed affection in public?
2. kissed someone?
3. french kissed someone?
4. kissed someone other than on the lips?
5. fondled someone’s covered genitals?
6. fondled someone’s bare genitals?
7. had your covered genitals fondled?
8. had your bare genitals fondled?
9. been propositioned?
10. propositioned someone?
11. fondled someone who was asleep?
12. attempted to seduce someone?
13. lied to someone in order to seduce them?
14. received mononucleosis (kissers disease)?
15. have you or your partner had an orgasm while petting?
16. had oral sex performed on you?
17. performed oral sex on someone yourself?
18. done both simultaneously (69)?
19. maneuvered someone into bed somewhat against their will?
20. had someone manuever you into bed somewhat against your will?
21. successfully used any drug to lower someone’s inhibition?
22. imitated the motions of sexual intercourse while clothed?

Continuing section 6 homosexual

For the remainder of the homosexual section, SEX means any of the following: Oral sex (either way), mutual masturbation, anal intercourse, crotch-to-crotch grinding, tongue-bathing

1. had sex with more than one person?
2. had sex with more than five people?
3. had sex with more than ten people?
4. had sex more than ten times with one person?
5. had sex more than once in the same 24 hour period?
6. had sex more than 5 times in the same 24 hour period?
7. had sex more than 10 times in the same 24 hour period?
8. had sex with both sexes within 24 hours?
9. been decidedly bisexual for a period of time?
10. considered never being heterosexual again?
11. had sex with someone of a different race?
12. had sex with more than one person within 24 hours?
13. had sex while someone was watching?
14. had sex out of doors?
15. had sex in a place where you could have been discovered?
16. had sex for money or paid for sex yourself?
17. had sex for some other favor or given some favor for sex?
18. had sex with someone more than five years older or younger than you?
19. had sex with someone more than ten years older or younger than you?
20. picked someone up or let someone pick you up?
21. been in a menage-a-trois?

End of homosexual section.

Section 7: seriously kinky things

1. used food for masturbating with?
2. eaten it afterwards?
3. used a feather?
4. used a nylon stocking or something like it?
5. used a basket?
6. worn a grope suit?
7. used tacks and/or salt?
8. used ropes, chains, cuffs, or any other type of bondage device?
9. used a whip or something similar for pain?
10. fist-fucked?
11. used bowling pin or similar object?
12. performed oral sex after intercourse (without washing)?
13. inflicted pain or had pain inflicted during sex?
14. drawn blood or had blood drawn by biting?
15. been involved in cunnilingus during a woman’s period?
16. licked someone’s anus?
17. licked someone’s anus while they were defecating?
18. swallowed your partner’s orgasmic secretions?
19. drank someone’s urine (including your own)?
20. drank human blood?
21. drank someone else’s nasal mucous?
22. kissed your partner after oral sex?
23. put your hand in your mouth after masturbating?
24. had oral sex in a moving car?
25. gotten oral sex from someone with braces?
26. done #207 and #208 simultaneously?
27. had intercourse in a moving car?
28. had intercourse while driving?
29. licked your partner’s feet or had your feet licked?
30. tongue bathed someone or been tongue bathed?
31. been involved in oxygen deprivation for sexual enhancement?
32. put any kind of food on your partner’s body and then eaten it?
33. had sex with an animal?
34. had sex with an animal more than once?
35. had sex with more than one kind of animal?
36. performed oral sex on an animal?
37. had oral sex performed on you by an animal?
38. had sex with a small animal (dog, cat, chicken, duck, lab rat, etc.)?
39. played an instrument, hacked, watched tv, etc. while having sex?
40. made tapes (audio or video) of yourself having sex?
41. been involved in nude picture-taking?
42. had (or should I say STILL HAVE) genital herpes?
43. transmitted herpes?
44. been involved in group sex (four or more)?
45. been involved in bisexual group sex?
46. made intimate contact with two or more people at the same time?
47. been in a group of more than ten people having sex?
48. had sex with both a girl and her mother at different times?
49. had sex with both a girl and her mother at the same time?
50. been in a two IN one?
51. had sex in a church or other place of religion?
52. been in a 69 circle?
53. been in a buttfuck circle?
54. had sex in/under water (including shower or bath)?
55. masturbated while making or receiving an obscene phone call?
56. had sex non-stop for over 30 minutes?
57. had sex non-stop for over an hour?
58. had sex non-stop for over three hours?
59. had family pet walk all over you during sex?
60. had more than one orgasm during sex?
61. had more than three?
62. #243 for your partner?
63. #244 for your partner?
64. disturb any other person by making noise during sex?
65. used ben-wa balls?
66. committed any felony not previously mentioned?